Heaven On Earth

FOG AGAIN ON THE ROAD THROUGH THE MOUNTAINS. I LOVE BURSTING THROUGH pockets of softness into crystal clarity...then round a corner and dive back into the softness...a blanket pulling us close, like a darkened restaurant, making us think it is just the two of us here.

REALIZATION. I don't know what triggered the thought as I drove, but when I hear something I don't like and it is hard for me to pull away at that moment, I start singing "Jesus loves me this I know...'cause the Bible tells me so..." (uh...silently). I don't know where this comes from since I am not religious, do not attend church and never read the Bible. It's a child's song. Maybe it's what I sang to myself during childhood times of trauma...my mantra of protection.

What words do you repeat when you need comforting?

REALIZATION. Every now and then I have seen a psychic for a bit of new information about me. Several have told me I am here to create heaven on earth. Huh. Seems like an awful big task for one itty bitty person.

Then I met a woman setting up a display of tiny bottles filled with brilliant liquid that moved as if alive. Color. Pretty. Light. I was pulled in like a fish on a hook.

"Pick a bottle, any bottle." My hand began reaching for one with brilliant green on top and lipstick pink on the bottom. She looked in her Aura Soma book. Ah. #65 (I think). Heaven on earth.

Years later, I understand I don't have to create heaven on earth for everyone, just for me. And when I am in joy, pure joy, I am in heaven. And then my heaven spills out and touches all around me...and, maybe for a moment, others feel the perfection of All That Is.

Why are you here?

REALIZATION. After talking to Mark last night, I thought about what he said:  Maybe we've gotten used to things feeling bad.

Maybe he's right. Maybe it snuck up on us...quietly on tip toe...a little closer each day. And we, without courage, never turned to watch its approach. In time, it threw its arms around us, constricting our heart.

We got used to living in a smaller box. Things changed here, a little at a time, and "they" made the box smaller and smaller, until we were scrunched down into a tiny ball. Well, that's one view of what happened.

But since I believe I create my life, here's my view:  Once upon a time, there was a shrinking box. It was known throughout the land to grow smaller and smaller. Knowing this, we still climbed inside. As it grew smaller, we bent and contorted our bodies into unnatural positions so that we might still fit. Head down, knees bent, arms around our legs, we reached up and pulled closed the lid. From inside, our muffled voice said:  I'm OK...we're OK here...no problem...we jus nee frashsel nrstl kerchrrj...

I believe I create my reality by the things I look at, think about, talk about, dream about, pretend, fantasize, and feel. I know I create my life. I want to do it on purpose, not be accident. I choose to deliberately create it. No longer will I live by default...accepting what others believe...for it does not serve me. I choose my Life.

Throwing my arms out wide, I break down the walls of my box and step out into the open.

Ooooo. It's scary out here. All this space. No walls, no boundaries to hold me.

The air is fresher...the light brighter.

My body begins to relax and stretch as it tests muscles so long ignored.

I might get used to this.

What have you gotten used to?

GIFT. I believe there are gifts in this job shift. My gift today was the one Mark emailed me. He said he read my entire blog in one sitting and that it was funny & serious, thoughtful & inspiring, and really beautiful. (Sigh) That feels sooo good. I'm going to keep his email as the inspiration for each posting. And I'll tuck it into my "I Wanna Feel Good" file so I can pull it out any time I need to. Thank you, Mark!

May heaven surround you today.

Warmly,


Catherine